The Northwest's Never Never Land

A couple of weeks ago we were planning a business trip to Seattle when I offhandedly suggested that we should go to Victoria, British Columbia afterward. We had an unused train ticket from Whitefish, Montana to Vancouver, Washington that needed to be either used or charged backed to our card so we were able to rationalize a low cost vacation without spending much extra. I had no idea that this very simply put together plan would be one of our favorite trips that we have been on together.

We headed up to Seattle on the train early Wednesday morning on the Amtrak Cascades which is our favorite train because of it travels 80+ MPH in some places (I used my GPS.) It was a cold clear morning and the leaves in most of the northwest had already turned yellow and orange. All of this color at 80 miles per hour made the train ride to Seattle feel like the beginning of the old Dr. Who program.

We actually arrived in Seattle a little before our scheduled time so Nicole and I walked from the station, to downtown, to Pike's Place Market, to Belltown, and finally to the Space Needle.

In order to be "mobile" we had packed 4 nights worth of clothes in our respective backpacks. In the planning phase this seemed completely rational. Around the Belltown portion of our trip Nicole was in complete agony. She had injured her back (most likely from ping pong) a week earlier (but after we had made arrangements for the trip) and had thought that it was in shape to carry a pack. I could tell by her face that the whole "backpacking around Seattle and Victoria" wasn't realistic.

We sat down at Zeek's Pizza and discussed scenarios from going home (right then) to pushing through with pain killers and buying a huge pack for me to carry everything in. After a long discussion, Nicole surrendered her mind (pain does that) and asked me to make the best choice. I sat there staring into space for a very long time. After pushing around ideas I called a cab and we rode up to that evenings destination near Green Lake.

That first evening (our business portion of the trip) was with the organizers of Club Rust and managers of Rancho La Paloma. (I wrote back in July about how that experience affected me and gave me the desire to be a part of something like this.) We enjoyed an incredible dinner with them and great conversation. We had the most wonderful time with their family and can't wait to see them again.

The alarm was very unwelcome at 5:30am. It took me nearly two minutes to find my cell phone (alarm) and make it stop beeping. It was of course pitch black outside and the house was completely silent. We had to catch the bus to the Ferry before 6:15am so Nicole shuffled to the shower and I repacked our bags. We tried as quietly as possible to not wake anyone as we walked through the complete darkness of a home we barely knew. I'm sure everyone woke up as I walked awkwardly up the stairs without any lights carrying two giant backpacks. Nicole's back had reached its peak in pain the night before and in the morning felt somewhat better. I still decided to carry both packs for now, despite Nicole's protests.

Once out on the street we walked a couple of blocks to a gas station to get change for the bus. I had forgotten how many people in Seattle commute at such an early hour. Even at the bus stop there were a handful of people wearing business attire for work and it was barely after 6am.

We boarded the bus and I was once in awe of the Seattle phenomenon of a completely full bus (people standing too) yet there was absolutely no talking. I could only hear the sound of the bus brakes and the occasional "ding" informing the operator that a stop has been requested. It reminded me of when I was riding the same bus system years ago:

(by the way...below is a flashback story so if you want to skip down to the current event, read past the italics.)

I had a morning routine. Living alone on Queen Anne made me very regimented. Every workday I would get up, turn on the TV (I worked in TV so I had to see what was going on in the world as it was going to be what my day was focused on.) After absorbing the headlines, I would head to the shower, get dressed and walk out the door.

I liked to leave a little early in the morning (didn't have to be to work until 8am) so I could get in a long walk to the Starbucks (I think it was on Boston and Queen Anne Ave.) I loved walking there for several reasons. First was for the mocha. This was my kick-start for the high energy environment that I was headed to (a newsroom.) Second was (and this is sorta sad) that it was the first place every day where I would actually talk to another person. I'm guessing that for many of those who are single and live in the city, the first thing you hear from another person at the beginning of the day is "Welcome to Starbucks, can I take your order?"

The third reason I walked up to this location was because the bus route originated (i.e. first stop.). This meant I could guarantee a seat anywhere on the bus. After much thought and many bus rides I determined that the best seat was behind the back door on the right-hand side of the bus. From this perch, I could see everyone in front of me and because there is a Plexiglas shield separating the doorway and that elevated position, I could see reflections behind me. I could see all.

Typically I would sit in this seat, drink my Starbucks, listen to music, and read (all at the same time.) From time to time I would remove my headphones just to listen to a quiet, full bus. Again, full bus...people standing in the aisle...no sound, just engine noise.

Until the morning I changed all of that--if only for a moment. On that particular day, I rode the bus sitting at my typical perch, listening to Cirrus and reading "Fight Club" for the tenth time. It was a warmer day because I remember feeling the sun on my arm and wearing short sleeves.

I was halfway to my destination and fully involved with my book when the hair on my right arm kept twitching like a piece of lint was caught in it. With my coffee in my left hand and my headphones in my ears I looked to my right and saw the biggest, hairiest spider I had ever seen in my life, headed up my arm toward the open part of my sleeve.

My reaction was what you would expect of any twenty-something former Marine. I screamed like a little girl. Not only did I scream, but I screamed until I could hear myself over the music in my headphones. The coffee in my left hand flew up and mocha coated the Plexiglas in front of me. I brushed the hairy spider off my arm and it fell to the floor in front of me. I stomped and stomped HARD until I was convinced that I had killed it by observing the bug juices smeared on the floor.

At this point I was oblivious to anything else around me and my headphones were still in my ears. I regained my composure and looked around the bus. Everyone was staring at me like I was crazy. To them I had screamed and stomped the floor for no apparent reason. I tried to explain it to the one person who maintained eye contact with me, but he just shook his head.

After a couple of minutes I could see other people giggling to each other about my reaction--I laughed pretty hard at myself, too. I tried to imagine what it must have looked like to all the other business commuters on that dead silent bus.

Starting the next day I took an earlier bus and did so for the rest of my time in Seattle.

Now...back to our story . . .

(just after 6am on the bus going to the ferry terminal)

We hopped off the bus near the Space Needle and walked the remaining 1/2 mile to Pier 69 where we were to catch the Victoria Clipper. It was just before 7am and the sun was still down. It felt like we were the only people on the waterfront. Once inside the terminal we got in line, passed through security and got on board.

The Victoria Clipper is a relatively high speed, fully enclosed passenger ferry that takes people from Seattle to Victoria, British Columbia in about 2 and a half hours. The ferry we were on had two levels with a view from nearly every seat. There were also food and beverages served on board so Nicole and I were able to wake up with a fresh cup of coffee.

About an hour after leaving Seattle the sun broke through the clouds and we were able to see the many islands and the shoreline of the Olympic Peninsula. For the time remaining on the boat I watched for any signs of a breaching killer whale while Nicole spread out over 3 seats and was swayed asleep by the gentle rocking of the boat.

I had never been to Victoria and to be honest, had always been turned off by what I had heard. "Oh the gardens and flowers are so beautiful," or "You must have high tea at the Empress Hotel". The more I heard about it, the more it sounded like something that would never appeal to me.

The boat slowed and eventually we made our way through Outer Victoria Harbor (or should I say Harbour?) As we entered the Inner Harbour I felt like we were arriving on the shores of some European country. The unique, modern architecture of the condos and homes were a refreshing change from the typical style that line the streets of the Pearl District in downtown Portland. Mixed in with new was the old...Victorian old. The Empress Hotel is on the elbow of the Inner Harbour and as we approached the still waters reflected the red ivy that covered the building. I could tell by looking that Victoria wasn't just a city of flowers and tea; it was a cosmopolitan town with international influence.

We hardly took two steps out of Canadian Customs before I pulled my camera out and started taking pictures of everything. On each trip I try to learn a little more about my camera and photography, and I think that on this trip it paid off. Because the sun was so low in the sky (even at midday) the lighting was perfect for pictures. The majority of the pictures I took were a little on the dark side, but that touch made the photos even more "European." (When was the last time you saw a bright picture of London, Paris, or Amsterdam?)

We walked to our hostel (near Chinatown) and checked our packs in (we couldn't check in until 3pm) and headed back to town to find a bite to eat. Nicole had done research before our trip and found a very good (and cheap) sushi restaurant, Sushi Plus. For those of you that need sushi to be served in a neo-uber-space age-sterile-swanky-pretentious-environment, Sushi Plus is not for you. It was a very small, hole-in-the-wall restaurant where you can see all of the food being prepared. The nigiri wasn't dyed which made the whole experience seem a lot more legitimate. It was obviously a local choice because it was packed with business people (not tourists...except us.)

We visited the many restaurants, stores, and sights of the area-all of them wonderful. I do want to list the restaurants and our hostel as it may be useful for those who need some travel ideas:

Our accommodations:

Ocean Island Backpackers Inn
http://www.oceanisland.com/
1-888-888-4180
791 Pandora Avenue
Victoria, British Columbia
Canada

Cons: If you want to go to sleep before 1am...bring earplugs.

Pros: Clean rooms, great functional furniture (think IKEA), infinite hot water, little cafe/bar on premises, travel information galore, and international traveler energy.

- - -

Places We Ate:

Sushi Plus
Irish Times
Demitasse
Green Cuisine
Siam Thai
The Mint
Mirage Coffee

The next day we walked all over Victoria. We went to hat shops, vegan restaurants (I drank water), many clothing stores and walked around the harbour.

I could spend all day taking pictures. We stood out on a rocky point in the cold, snapping photos of ferries, planes, and boats that seemed to go in and out of the harbor non-stop.

The planes were fun to watch because (on this day) they were flying in from the west, dropping down near the bridge, then suddenly banking to the right just before touching down on the water. It is definitely worth watching if you are ever in Victoria.

That evening (Friday night) Nicole and I hit the town...to the best of our ability. We had incredible Thai food and I am convinced that I ate an entire red onion (my dish was ground chicken, cilantro, red onion, and a little bit of lemon or lime juice).

After we finished we decided to go to a pub for a drink and desert. The whole town was packed with locals (mostly students from University of Victoria) so it was a little hard to find a place that wasn't standing room only. We eventually found a nice, down-tempo bar known as The Mint. Admittedly, we stood out like sore thumbs in our sensible clothing amongst the swankiest of swanky. That didn't stop me from ordering a Phillips Chocolate Porter and a piece of chocolate cake. Nicole ordered a fresh raspberry pureed mint julep. Though we didn't stay there long, we enjoyed sitting at the bar, looking around at the artwork and watching people. The bartenders were very nice and hospitable. The Mint is a place where you can hang out, listen to live music (that night there was a DJ) and "be cool" for hours on end.

The next day we took the public bus to Butchart Gardens. We had procrastinated this trip because the weather the day before was so gloomy. Saturday ended up being the best day because it was sunny and gorgeous outside.

The bus ride from Victoria was just under 45 minutes but that was because it was public transit. There are buses that go straight there, but they cost more than we were willing to shell out. It's also nice to ride the public bus because you meet some interesting people...but I'll get to that in a little bit.

The gardens are spectacular (even though there are far fewer flowers than spring and summer.) Nicole and I fought over the camera as we walked around the fifty acre park. The gardens are split into several sections such as a Japaneese garden, Rose garden, Chinese garden, etc. At the bottom of this entry is a link to more pictures of our trip and of the gardens.

Our plan was to go to a nearby Cajun restaurant that served alligator meat, but after walking through the gardens, I talked Nicole out of it because of time considerations (we had to be back to the ferry by 5pm.) After my hotdog at the visitor center, we hopped back onto the public transit bus to town.

As I mentioned, public transportation can help travelers meet interesting people. Because the bus was completely packed Nicole and I were forced to stand with many others in the aisle. About halfway through the trip I turned to see Nicole talking with someone at the very back of the bus. The girl she was talking to had a white face, black hair, and fake blood running from her mouth to her neck. Nicole asked if the girl was on her way to a Halloween party. The girl explained that the makeup was for something completely different.

Apparently in towns across the world there are random "flash mob" events called....wait for it...wait for it...Zombie Walks. The way it works is people go to a website (such as this one zombiewalk.com) and find out when and where a zombie walk will be held. At the time and place the zombie walk will be held people show up in full zombie costumes and makeup. Once assembled, they depart from the meeting location and walk around acting like zombies to another destination. The mob will go through malls, town squares, and even clog intersections all while holding their arms out in front of them and screaming "more brains" (you may need to do your zombie research to understand.)

After quizzing this girl, Nicole found out that the Zombie Walk was at 4 pm at a square close to our hostel. Excited for the photo opportunity, we got off at our stop, grabbed a quick bite to eat and went to the square and waited for them to gather.

I could not believe the number of people that showed up for this event. There were zombies everywhere. From little children to seniors, there were people who had spent hours on makeup. Nicole and I felt like press photographers as we ran around snapping photos at the very willing subjects.

Just before 4pm the mob came to life and started zombie-ing across the square and into town. I have to admit it was very eerie to have hundreds of people walk toward you (all in character) and scream "we want to eat brains!" In a few minutes the mob of nearly a thousand people filtered into the city and out of sight.

Here is a handful of the zombie pictures we took: http://picasaweb.google.com/NicoleandJeff/ZombiesInVictoria#

On our trip to catch the ferry (half an hour later) we ran into the mob again. This time they were far more dispersed and taking advantage of the uneasiness that it caused tourists on the street. Zombies were chasing people, walking up to cars at stoplights, and posing at every photo opportunity. We found ourselves captivated...so much so that we had to rush to catch our ferry.

On the ferry Nicole faded in and out of sleep, while I sat with a recently retired couple who were on their last leg of an around-the-world trip. They had gone from Chicago to Poland to India to Thailand to South Korea to Canada (Vancouver then Victoria) and were going to Seattle before returning to Illinois. Apparently they have been doing these 3 week "around the world" trips for the last 15 years. Each time they change it up a bit and visit different countries. The husband and I talked almost the entire trip about cameras, GPS devices, and the many places they have been.

We arrived in Seattle near 9pm and we had no idea where we were going to stay. You think we would have learned after THIS incident.

We walked up to the hostel near Pike's Place Market and checked to see if they had any private rooms. The guy at the front desk told us that they didn't but that we should check up the street at a place called the Moore Hotel. I barely wanted to stay at a hostel and the idea of staying in a cheap hotel nearby made me uneasy. At this point, Nicole and I talked about splurging on a really nice hotel.

Nevertheless, we walked the three or four blocks up the street to check out the Moore Hotel. Before walking in I told Nicole "let's ask to SEE the room before doing this." I was a little jaded from our Lynnwood experience a couple of months earlier.

At the front desk was Bob. Bob was about our age, energetic, clean cut yet Seattle-esque. He told us that the rooms were just over 60 bucks (not including tax) and that some had shared bathrooms. We decided to check out a room with its own bathroom. The room we checked out was clean, simple and seemed like a bargain so Nicole and I went back down and told him that we would take it (or one like it.)

Nicole asked Bob point-blank what the catch was. The entire lobby was marble and the building was vintage and clean. The rooms were very nice, very clean, and quiet, but the price seemed too good to be true. We had just called the Westin to check their rates (just a few blocks away) and they wanted 280 bucks a night. Nicole asked without any hesitation, "Is this place haunted?" Bob explained that the Moore Hotel was left to the wife and daughters of the prior owner and that the family isn't interested in turning the place into a swanky hotel. With that, Bob checked us into our room (mumbling something about an upgrade) and we took the ancient, tiny elevator to the fifth floor.

After walking down the longest, quietest hallway, we arrived at our room. Nicole gasped when she opened the door. Bob had REALLY upgraded us. We had expected to see a bed and a window like the first room we checked. Instead, it was a dining area (with a table for 8) a living room, a kitchen, and in the distance a glass door to the bedroom. It was huge. The windows were gigantic. There was a couch and two love seats, a refrigerator, stove top, and a flat screen TV. The bedroom had a gigantic bed and a view of the Sound (between buildings.) I was shocked at what we got for such a great price.

We went back downstairs to get suggestions for late night food and to thank Bob for the upgrade. He named off a few places to grab a late night snack and we decided to go with his suggestion for an Italian restaurant called La Vita E Bella in Belltown.

The food there was incredible! I actually found myself staring at my food trying to figure out how to prolong my meal (I got a mushroom ravioli) so it would never end. Our server was very helpful and we ended up talking with her for the majority of the meal. I highly recommend this place if you are ever in Seattle.

The next morning we walked to the train station, discussing our trip the whole time. We swung by a great coffee joint just before boarding the train, called Zeitgeist Coffee. Nicole even made the claim that they made the best rice latte she has ever had.

Eventually we boarded our train bound for Portland excited for our next adventure...whatever it may be.

Here are more photos from the trip: http://picasaweb.google.com/NicoleandJeff/VictoriaTrip#

Seattle To Portland (The Long Way)

After having a traumatic evening the night before (see this entry) we decided to make up for it by taking a creative way back to Portland. Originally we considered driving from Federal Way to Yakima to Goldendale to Portland but thought that it would take way too long considering that we checked out at 12:01 pm.

View Larger Map
Instead, (after a wonderful breakfast/lunch at Poverty Bay Coffee Company) we headed east to Auburn determined to travel to Portland on back roads behind Mt. Rainier and Mt. Saint Helens. We stopped briefly for $50 worth of gas (around 12 gallons) in Enumclaw where we purchased a necessary map of Washington.

I had always wanted to go this way ever since I read the account of Kenneth Arnold when I was a little boy:

Kenneth A. Arnold (born March 29, 1915 in Sebeka, Minnesota; died January 16, 1984 in Bellevue, Washington) was an American businessman and pilot. He is best-known for making what is generally considered the first widely reported unidentified flying object sighting in the United States, after claiming to see nine unusual objects flying in a chain near Mount Rainier, Washington on June 24, 1947. Arnold described the objects' shape as resembling a flat saucer or disc, and also described their erratic motion as resembling a saucer skipped across water; from this, the press quickly coining the new terms "flying saucer" and "flying disc" to describe such objects, many of which were reported within days after Arnold's sighting. Later Arnold would add that one of the objects resembled a crescent or flying wing.

Unfortunately, we saw no UFOs on our trip.

One other thing that was present in my mind was the road/valley on the way to Mt Rainier. During every television "sweeps" period in the Seattle Area, there seems to be an in-depth story on the risk of a Lahar flowing from Mt. Rainier to the Seattle area. Wikipedia uses the canyon that we drove up to Rainier as an example:

A lahar is a type of mudflow composed of pyroclastic material and water that flows down from a volcano, typically along a river valley. The term 'lahar' originated in the Javanese language of Indonesia. In Hindi 'lahar' means 'wave'. Lahars have the consistency of concrete: fluid when moving, then solid when stopped. Lahars can be huge: the Osceola lahar produced 5,600 years ago by Mount Rainier in Washington produced a wall of mud 460 ft deep in the White River canyon and extends over an area of over 130 sq mi for a total volume of 0.55 cubic miles.

As we made our way to Sunrise, Washington I was surprised how "climbable" Mt. Rainier seemed to look. Of course 14,411 isn't exactly a day hike no matter how easy it looks. Also the mountain is famous for it's many crevasses which were visible from our location at 6400 feet. Even at this elevation the summit is still over a mile (7711 feet) in vertical elevation.

We drove down the mountain and managed to find yet another traffic jam. This time it was just past the Yakima turnoff toward Packwood, Washington. The construction seemed to go on for miles and miles and we felt sorry for a large group of motorcycle riders that had to drive over the gravel portions on their shiny Harleys.

As we approached Packwood I thought about another childhood curiosity...Bigfoot. Growing up I had studied Bigfoot as most 4th graders did and knew that we were in the heart of Sasquatch country. One story in particular has always peaked my interest:

1924: Fred Beck and four other miners claimed to have been attacked by several sasquatches in Ape Canyon in July, 1924. The creatures reportedly hurled large rocks at the miners’ cabin for several hours during the night. This case was publicized in newspaper reports printed in 1924. The Ape Canyon area has long been held to be a bigfoot refuge. Tribes in the area have believed that this is a home of the bigfoot. Ape Canyon was reportedly the site of a violent encounter in 1924 between a group of miners and a group of Sasquatch. Their account was publicized in several July 1924 issues of The Oregonian.[2] One of the miners, Fred Beck, claimed the miners shot and killed one of the creatures and that night a large group of Sasquatch attacked their cabin and tried to break-in. William Halliday, director of the Western Speleological Survey, claimed in his 1983 pamphlet Ape Cave and the Mount Saint Helens Apes' that the miner's assailants were actually local youths. Until the very last summer of Ape Canyon's existence in 1979, counselors from the YMCA's Camp Meehan on nearby Spirit Lake brought hikers to the canyon's edge and related a tradition that the 1924 incident was actually the result of young campers throwing light pumice stones into the canyon, not realizing there were miners at the bottom. Looking up the miners would have only seen dark moonlit figures throwing stones at their cabin. The narrow walls of the canyon would have served to distort the voices of the YMCA campers enough to frighten the men below. However, Halliday's explanation may fail to account for several factors:

• Beck claimed that the "apes" were seen clearly enough to note that they were not human;
• Beck claimed that one of the "apes" was shot and killed, but its unclear if Halliday claims that one of the stone-throwing teenagers was shot and killed in 1924.
• According to a series of 1924 articles in The Oregonian, multiple reporters and other eyewitnesses saw damage to the cabin, and enormous footprints at the scene of the "ape assault", and it's difficult to imagine how stone-throwing teenagers might have caused these details.

And An Interesting Missing Skier Story From Ape Canyon

In 1950 a skier named Jim Carter was with a group of other men from The Mountaineers club, but went off by himself to film the group as they went down the hill. He was never seen again, despite a massive 1 week search. One of the search team members said he had a chilling feeling of being watched the entire time. Carter's ski tracks seemed to indicate that he took off at a very high speed, making tremendous jumps that no experienced skier would make unless he was frightened beyond reason or being pursued. His ski tracks led to the edge of a cliff, but a search below never produced his body.


For the nearly 9 hours we spent in the car from Seattle to Portland, we saw some incredible countryside in some places so remote that we didn't pass a car for an hour and a half (this was behind Mt. Saint Helens.) The drive, though long, fulfilled a curiosity that I have long held since I was a boy. . .

We're off to Washington D.C. for a couple of weeks followed by a cross country trip back to Oregon.

10 Minutes In A Scary Motel In Lynnwood, Washington

Authors Note: I thought that this story (though part of our 24 hour Seattle Visit) deserved a separate entry. Just in case you have ever considered staying in a place because the price seemed like a good deal, or you were too tired to look for a better place or you just had to go to the bathroom, take our advice...never EVER second guess your gut instinct (in fact here is a link to 2 great books all about trusting your instincts: The Gift of Fear and Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking. Nicole and I have read both of these and credit them for our decisions 9 minutes after checking in.

So Nicole and I went up to Seattle to visit friends and relatives on Wednesday, July 16th because it had been way too long since we had been up there (almost a year.) Seattle isn't on our list of favorite places to stay for a number of reasons (see left.) (Note: Both Nicole and I have lived in Seattle at different times before we met, so it's fun to visit each other's old stomping grounds.) But I had a friend that I hadn't seen for years who wanted to take us out on his boat on Lake Washington.

After spending the late afternoon cruising around the lake, we were dropped off at our car just after 8pm. We had a couple of hotel areas in mind when we drove away from Mercer Island such as University Village, Northgate Mall, Tukwila, and the base of Queen Anne Hill.

We headed north to University Village and didn't get the "vibe" that it was in our price range so we went further north. We stopped at a Hotel called the Nexus, where they wanted $180 plus tax and as far as I could tell it was just a renovated Ramada Inn (see Yelp Review Here) The fact that the guy behind the counter took a call from his personal cell phone before helping Nicole sealed the deal...we weren't staying there.

After nearly two hours of aimless driving we ended up on highway 99 (aka Aurora) and we were getting desperate. Now instinctively I knew that we should avoid no name motels on Aurora especially after putting this web page together a number of years ago when I worked in Seattle. For some reason, a modern looking motel seemed safe...it was made from stucco and looked like a Days Inn or a Motel 6.

This place (which will remain nameless until all of our credit cards have been refunded) had the right price in our time of desperation (under $70) and looked "safe."

From the moment we got out of the car, little situation indicators were telling us "DON'T STAY HERE." On the hotel sign it read "Weekly Rates $250" and the lobby, though clean, seemed sparse (maybe so people couldn't steal things?) The gentleman behind the counter was a very nice guy who, oddly enough, was also folding towels (my brain said that this is how the hotel owner keeps housecleaning staff minimal...later I would find out how minimal it was.) All of these indications and we checked in anyway.

On the advice of the hotel clerk/housekeeper, we parked in the "covered parking" area which was a euphemism for parking under the building. As I parked in one of MANY empty parking spots I saw a man walking slowly around a convertible (the top was down) Mercedes. It was by far the nicest car in the lot and had custom wheels and a gold paint job. This man seemed to be circling slowly with a plastic bag. As we passed another conspicuous car (primary held together with duct tape and garbage bags) the man started to pretended to wax the Mercedes using a napkin from inside his plastic bag.

Nicole gave me a quiet nod to let me know that she felt like this guy was somewhat harmless and we went inside. Inside we boarded the elevator to go up to the third (top) floor. The elevator was all metal inside and every square inch of it had been scratched by keys or knives of various gang signs. I have to say because every part of the elevator was vandalized...it almost looked like a beautiful art...almost.

As the doors opened to the third floor I could immediately smell intense cigarette smoke, which was odd because in the lobby a sign had posted no smoking anywhere on the premises. As we walked down the hall we could smell smoke coming from nearly every room and TVs were blaring. We arrived at our room and this was the first time I saw the key that was given to Nicole.

The key looked like it was made sometime after regular hotel keys (the typical metal ones) and a period before the common magnetic strip key. It was as if we had been handed the "8-Track" of keys. In my mind, it looked like a key that a hacker could mess with so he could open any room...like ours. I fiddled with it to get it to work and our door opened a little too easily.

Once inside the room I felt this overwhelming feeling of dread come over me. The window was wide open, the refrigerator was in the middle of the kitchenette (or I suspect was once a kitchenette,) none of the lights worked, and the floor was covered in stains.

When I say covered with stains I mean that there was more stain than carpet. It was a hyperlink blue color with stains that were lighter and significantly darker than the rest of the floor. In one corner there were freshly cut fingernails. At that point I stopped looking at the floor and told Nicole that we were not staying.

Unfortunately we had been in the car for hours and Nicole needed to use the bathroom. If you want to hear about what was in that bathroom...you will have to ask her. Her story when she got out traumatizes me to this day.

While I had been waiting her I turned on the TV. By pure coincidence, it was tuned a station airing American History X at one of the most gruesome points of the movie. If you have seen the movie, you know the scene. At this point I was getting a little worried about spending another second in the motel.

Nicole came out of the bathroom and we immediately went downstairs (via the stairs this time) which reeked of urine. As soon as we walked into the lobby the guy behind the desk knew exactly what we would say next. He said that he understood and he refunded the money immediately. I could tell by the way he handled the situation and his look on his face that this wasn't the first time people had asked for their money back.

We walked back to the "covered parking lot" to find that same man hovering over the same Mercedes. He was talking to a woman in the parking lot and I decided to take a better look at him. Initially I had thought he was homeless, but it was because of his haircut and unshaven appearance. When I took a closer look, his hair was intentionally feathered in a mullet fashion simialarly to how Chuck Norris looked in the 80s. This man had acid wash jeans and very expensive looking shoes. I now believed that the Mercedes was in fact his car and he was a pimp. I decided not to make too much eye contact and quickly tossed the bags in the trunk.

We drove around for an hour and a half more looking for a reasonably priced hotel (under $200) in the Seattle area. Everything in the area was booked so hotels were able to name their price (which in this experience I learned that all the hotels know the status of competing hotels occupancy levels in the Seattle area and can adjust their rate accordingly.) We were exhausted and I was seriously considering driving back to Portland in the middle of the night.

Fortunately we found a Choice Hotels catalog that I had picked up on one of our many road trips. This little gem has every hotel in the U.S. listed including approximate rate per night. Nicole found a Comfort Inn in Federal Way and we set our course down Highway 99, planning to cross over at Sea-Tac International Airport to I-5.

It was 11:30 pm, Nicole was nearly in tears from exhaustion, and I was edgy and still recovering from the motel in Lynnwood when we hit a dead stop traffic jam just outside of Sea Tac. I started to laugh and Nicole stopped talking completely. It took us another half hour to get to Federal Way.

We did finally make it to the hotel and our stay was wonderful. Ironically in the morning we had some problems with the hot water and the hotel actually gave us some of our money back. When we got back in the car to head home the next morning we figured out that because of the refund that Comfort Inn gave us, our stay there ended up being cheaper than that of the Pimpin' Lynnwood Motel!

The rest of the drive home (which was the long way) I will cover in the next few days.